Have you noticed how difficult it is to concentrate on what you want to accomplish in your life when you are angry or sad?
The voice inside your head (your inner roommate) can be quite the chatterbox, particularly when things aren’t looking so hot. That’s when you start hearing from your friends that you haven’t been present to them or your manager tells you that your work has been slipping. You simply can’t focus in that state of mind, right?
There are going to be times when this happens and it’s okay. Life transitions are natural: deaths, breakups, moving are just some possibilities. Being gentle with yourself in these transitions is critical to moving forward and creating the results you desire in your life.
READ: I don’t expect you to be able to create results while you are mourning the loss of whatever has changed in your life. But there ARE ways to move through this emotional state quicker and with more ease, and let’s be clear, you still need to go through it!
What Helped Me Move Through Transitions to Return to Getting Results Faster
To be honest, transitions can have ups and downs, but there is another way of approaching the transition that can keep you consistent (think of it like skimming only the top of the waves rather than going up and down with the waves).
Wanna know the big secret?
It’s finding gratitude for the moment. It’s looking for what the value of this experience is; what is the lesson in this experience?
In focusing there, things stop happening TO you, but FOR your benefit. There’s a lot of gratitude in finding the lesson, learning from it and growing to new heights.
For example, when I was a senior in college, I did a first round interview with Goldman Sachs on campus. It was my first real interview with a company that may choose to hire me. I had a resume ready but what I didn’t know is how to prepare for the interview itself. I took a little time to prepare some answers the night before, but not much, and I dressed business casual to the interview.
When I saw how the other students were dressed, I realized I made a grave error. After the interview, I called my older brother crying and told him what happened. He helped me find the lesson and taught me what to wear and to carry a padfolio. He also helped me prepare for the second-round interview I miraculously got with Goldman Sachs after my kerfuffle (I did get cut after the second round).
I could have chosen to stay in pity and sadness over what I did, but I chose to find the lesson in that experience and it made me a stronger job searcher and candidate for the next interviews I got.
You can certainly spend a little time upset about making a mistake–get angry, cry, hit a pillow, whatever you need–but it is your choice how long you stay there before you return to creating the results you want in your life.
To moving onward and upward!